Imminent Transcendence

Let me start off by saying, I’m a very tolerant person of other people’s religious beliefs. If you believe in God, Jesus, Satan, Buddha, Allah, or whatever, then more power to you and I fully support your desicion to do so.

But, there is -one- group of people I have a problem with, and it’s not even the religion itself, just it’s people.

If, by now, you’re sitting there thinking “Oh god, this white trash American is going go wave his American flag, talk about how his country is the best in the world, and trash talk all the Muslims and call them all terrorists and whatnot.” then you ned to go take your hippy-self somewhere else, cuz you’re way off.

In short, no, I’m not going to talk about Muslim. I know a Jordanian man down the street and he’s a pretty cool guy.

No, this time, I’m going to talk about Jehova’s Witnesses.

Surely, everyone knows who these people are, they are the fuckers that come bother you on your day off from work while you’re sitting and relaxing at home, and when you be courteous and actually answer the fucking door, they refuse to leave.

But, alas, I didn’t have the pleasure of actual talking to these people, so I could tell them to piss off in front of their face.

Today, there were two Jehova’s Witnesses prowling around the street, whatever, no big deal to me. If they bug me, I’ll just say “I’m an Atheist, and no, no matter what you’re not going to recruit me. Good day to you.” and shut the door.

In fact, I didn’t even know they were on the street until I heard the front screen door slam shut, as it usually does when someone opens it.

So, I’m sitting here, minding my own business when I hear this “BAM!” Of course, I jump up and look outside the window. What do I see? A random black man walking away from my house in a quick pace.

At this point, I’m pissed, because it appears to be that someone, who I do not know, attempted to come into my house without permission.

I go to the front door and notice something sticking out of the bottom of it. I pick it up, and it’s fucking Jehova’s Witness propaganda.

At this point, I’m furious. This man scared me half to death by quietly (I mean quietly, normally you can hear it squeak when it’s opened but it didn’t even do that) opening the screen door and putting his trash in it, then let it slam, thus scaring me into thinking someone was trying to break in. I’m the only one home and everyone else is at school or work, so I know it’s not them else they would have called first.

Anyway, back to the sketchy black man. As he was walking away (in a very fast pace) he saw me in the window, then he proceeded to make a call on his cell phone and continuously look back at my house.

Now I’m in a rage. Why does he keep staring at my house while talking on his cell phone and trying to look at me through the window?

Now I’m just hoping they come back, so I can tell them where they can shove that little paper they gave us.

Oh, and by the way, if you’re a Jehova’s Witness, do the world a favor and stop shoving your bullshit propaganda and religious views down our throats. It’s called “freedom of religion” asshats, that means “I will pick what fucking religion I want to be in and NO you are not going to change that.”

Anyway, after reading this over I figure’d I’d mention that IF this man would have just come to my door and knocked, all would be well. But no, he OPENED my fucking door WITHOUT permission then made it look even more skep by walking away while trying to look back and see my in the window.

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